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penny k. hutchins
Reply with quote  #16 
GOD BLESS EACH OF YOU AND HAPPY EASTER AS WELL TO YOU ALL. last night i had a long talk with my mom about all of the stuff we still have to go through and she and i both decided to have a garage sale ( she loves selling stuff for 10.00 a WHACK!!!!)  but i felt i had a start. so today we were at dinner and my daughter says gramma i am so proud of you for wanting to have a garage sale. so mom says THERE IS NO GARAGE SALE AT MY HOUSE. END OF SUBJECT.!!!!! this is what i go through daily ....we talk about a plan of action and it all goes to heck. the only thing i can think of is having her evaluated for dementia and have a log everyday and what she agrees to do is have her sign it so she sees for herself what we discussed. i don't know what else to do. she is so darn awnry. i have to go in and have sinus surgery in 2 weeks and thank God my daughter is here to help. i am so thankful for this site and to all of you for listening and to know there are "others" out here. i am not giving up. i appreciate the person who talked of the manipulation.... i need to work on this and learn techniques as she is a little stinker. i thank all of you once again. penny

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Jane in MA
Reply with quote  #17 
Tell  her she can have a garage sale now and use the money for herself. for a wide screen TV or a hearing aid... or you will have a garage sale later and the cash  will go to you after she is dead  to send you go to Aruba and celebrate the cleansing of  # street name (insert her street name her)

Or tell her. "that's OK. We will have a nice bonfire after you are gone."

If she wants to be pig-headed, you need to show her that you can be pig-headed, too.

You are offering her a chance to help liquidate her things the way she might want them to be done. She is being a jerk and looking the other way.  It is denial. I know we are not supposed to acknowledge that our parents can be jerks sometimes   (because we are supposed to get on our hands and knees and thank them for their gift of life because they had sex and we are the end product).

 Don't let her jerk you around. Tell her to clean up her house while she can have some choice in the matter. If she doesn't,  then I'm afraid you will have to wait to clean up.
~Jane

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rosie
Reply with quote  #18 

Today my sis cooked lunch for dad and myself; I gave dad a paper napkin to wipe his mouth on.

When he finished his meal, he wiped - then I could see that napkin heading for his pocket, to be kept!! So I calmly walked round the table, took it from his hand, and popped it in the kitchen bin.....he kind of blinked but said nothing.

He has a bad habit of taking little pieces of toilet paper to use to wipe his eyes, or if he cuts himself, in spite of the fact that he has heaps of hankies, boxes of tissues, wads of cotton for meedical purposes.....he sees the use of toilet paper as being economical. Well, toilet paper is not particularly cheap any more and I told him so. PLus it's embarrassing if I take him for a hospital visit and he pulls out a little scrap of toilet paper to blow his nose on...aaarhg!!!

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